“Forgive me father, for I have sinned. This is my first confession…”
Fast backward to the year 2009 when I had my first Holy communion, I was stubborn and naughty. I just no dey hear word. The process of receiving this communion was tedious or we were outright unwilling.
Everything for me back then was fun. I made joke of everything and I had the backing of friends. MUMU WE. Whenever it was time for the catechism (A book, in question and answer form, summarizing the basic principles of Christianity) class, we get excited for it was time to show some mischief and get some unholy winks from girls whom we made to laugh. We loved it.
The class was always an interesting one but you would bear me witness, it was one that could get so serious. We were asked to clean the church, level the grasses, fetch firewood (cause the Bishop would come), do this and that. Those of us who showed signs of rebellion were taken note of.
The last day of the class, it was our parish priest who did the oral interview and he was a stern man, very strict to the bone. He asked questions that were not even in the catechism book. Some of my friends failed and were asked to go to the left hand side like the thief on the left hand side of Jesus.
After the process, we submitted our baptismal cards, the parish priest would sign them.
We all submitted, some sooner than later and I was at the “later” side. The priest did some selection and refused to sign most of the cards, well, I was among them. I received my card unsigned and the directive was simple “no priest signature, no First Holy Communion.
I tried a few times sighting the fact that I passed the test but my plea fell on deaf ears. But we were still asked to fetch firewood with those who had signatures. It was during one of this gathering that I told my friends that I won’t be a Mosses, never will I see the promised land and don’t go into it. I would sign my own card.
Immediately I made that announcement, I became their Jesus and they my disciples. Well, to cut the long story short, I perfected the Priest’s signature and signed it on my own with the help of one legit signature. My friends and others whom I knew nothing of came to me, some even to my house and I charged then #500 each for my services.
I was so good that till date, I still remember how it looks and could do a clean job on it.
THE day for our first confession came, I battled in my mind how I would go and confess to the same priest whose signature I had forged. Most of my friends had cancelled that Idea already. Luckily for me there were two priest that day, I might get lucky.
I shivered from one foot to the other until it got to my turn. I was NEXT. My parish priest had just finished crossing a repentant soul signalling I was next. I thought of running away, he is capable of disgracing me and not forgiving me. I dragged my foot over the other as I walked towards him.
Suddenly, the other priest crossed his repentant soul, I changed direction quickly, almost bumping into the other guy going for confession. The church wardens shouted at me but briskly I walked…
WORLD PEOPLE, Before anyone could do anything, I had already knelt down and blurted out the words quickly “Forgive me father, for I have sinned…”
The first picture with the title “holy communion” was the one I signed. The second picture bearing “confirmation” is the one the priest signed himself.
Though the parish priest is dead now, I pray I am forgiven.😢😢
World People Mansion
Room Mumu Me.